It's just too.

Hi I'm an architecture student in MMCL I live in Philippines in here we have trimester so 3 terms per year instead of 2, I chose architecture because I wanted to follow dad's footsteps, I'm a low mediocre student and uhh I barely passed the 1st Term because my professor was also kinda young just got into teaching like 2 years prior, also kinda forgiving since it's 1st term

Now moved on the 2nd term our professor was a chill mom like she was old around 50 or 60 perhaps, it was a breeze but the problem is we barely learned anything, and we passed it but our scores for some reason is all the same 2.50 (passed but around B-) in MMCL University 5.00 means failed so 1.00 is the highest, and I know some of my classmates are extremely good and has high grades but somehow all of us got the same score in the end of the sem, also our checked plates were supposed to be brought back to us but she didn't for some reason also so much free time on that sem like she kept moving deadlines if there were any students that wasn't finished so it was so easy that we got laid back and got used to it

(PRESENT)

3rd term last term our professor was the most terror out of all, me and my friends circle wanted have a professor that's not too lazy but also like balanced same as the 1st term, but no..... Our workload is so many this 3rd term and all of it has to be rendered etc. since our face 2 face classes are always only on Tuesday the thing that happens is all deadlines for each unit (currently have 4 units in archi HOA, BT, DESIGN and ARCHITECTURAL INTERIORS) and for my Wednesday it's all minor subjects and the only time I go to there is around Tuesday and Wednesday on school. Talk about my grades I'm barely hanging on grades I keep getting 50, 40 worse 20 25 out of 100 on all plates, never got 70 up except for group works and the first assignment the vlog, then exam hits and I keep getting low scores cause I'm struggling managing, my main problem is my procrastination and I'm gonna explain why

My routine is let's say after Tuesday the prof released 4 assignments Wednesday I go to minor subjects, Thursday I do minor subs and mostly chill and talk to my discord buddies the thing about me is that I know it's all my fault, there's an exam I review literally the day before, and here I am crying because I keep failing and falling, around 1st term and 2nd term I failed my math subject (SOLID MENSURATION) I understood the 1st term because I didn't really understood, but the pressure was there the feeling of my dad as an archi and my lolo and lola hoping for me, I was a very kind and very helpful kid towards my family, wanted to wash dishes always and always wanted to help so I kinda wanted that pressure everytime and everyday providing help by them but now that architecture is added its just way too hard. Back to the 3rd term, my grades are dangerous we barely passed every exam and per module, hell idk if im gonna pass, and once that happens the pressure is so high that I just wanna run away and hope that my dad and my mom understand my situation, next week July 14 is our final week all plates that was on July 21 was moved early for some reason and I FUCKINH HATE IT, so less time to prepare, and I know I'm gonna fail but dude I can't just I just wanna live with my family and just help them in there everyday lives like that's it maybe I just need to take a different course or something, but dude if I fail a major course it just gonna stack up, I overthink alot I don't strive for perfection but I procrastinate alot, I keep asking questions to my friends and its the most common sense questions, im just struggling alot like more than. I'm questioning why did I said to my dad I wanna took architecture he even said are you sure I can just be nursing since my habit of helping alot of chores and taking care habits like maid habits, or s game Dev or smth like comp sci, idk what to say anymore goodluck to me I know that I'm gonna fail and my dad and mom's an OFW and what they expect when they come home a happy son no I'm just gonna start crying and its just the pressure is just too strong I feel bad for them if I keep failing to keep there hopes up but even so idk what course fits me anymore I wanna fight but I feel like it's just not the course for me, I'm consistent but I'm slowly burned out etc