Getting back

Hi everyone,

This is my first time posting in this community because there's something I've been struggling with,

I want to get back into creating art. The problem is that I've been away from it for so long that I don't think I can even call it a "break" anymore. It feels more like I abandoned it.

As a child and all the way through middle school, I drew and painted all the time. It brought me so much joy. But when I started high school, I became very focused on studying and gradually stopped making art altogether. Somehow, that just became my life.

I've tried a few times over the years to start again, but it never lasted. And here I am once more, trying again—this time by writing this post.

I'm 27 now, and it's been around 10 years (maybe a little more) since I regularly drew. I know it's completely normal that my drawings aren't as good as I'd like them to be. I know there's nothing wrong with being rusty. But emotionally, I have a really hard time accepting how my drawings look. I feel embarrassed by them because I think they're ugly, and I can't stop thinking that I should be better than this. Sometimes I think, "If only I hadn't stopped all those years ago..."

Art used to be a huge part of who I was, but somewhere along the way, as I was growing up and becoming an adult, I lost that part of myself.

These days I work a regular 9-to-5 job that I genuinely like, but it has nothing to do with art. I don't want to become a professional artist or make money from it. I just want to create again—for myself. I want to feel that joy again, to feel like I'm making something with my own hands, and reconnect with that part of myself.

My biggest obstacle is perfectionism. It makes it incredibly hard to enjoy the process because I keep judging every drawing instead of simply letting myself learn again.

Has anyone here come back to art after a very long break? How did you deal with the frustration of feeling like you'd lost your skills? Do you have any advice on how to get past perfectionism and enjoy creating again?

I'd really appreciate any advice or personal experiences. Thank you for reading.