Avoiding therapy

I'm in my late 30s and I've never really been the social type. I've been consistently avoiding social situations anytime I could, which led to missing out on friendships, love, and intimacy. I've been at the same job for nearly 20 years, but I've never hung out with coworkers after hours or gone to any events.

Instead of facing it slowly and painfully, I decided to wait until I hit that "I'm almost 40 and still a virgin" FOMO, and I somehow found the courage to jump into paid companionships.

Taking that step was tough, but I'm kind of glad I did. However, I've realized I have my limits... After 7 sessions, I'm still showing up a nervous wreck. Even though the escorts seem to dig me and feel safe with me after we get past the initial awkwardness, it turns out it's pretty hard to have sex when your nervous system is always on high alert. What a shocker. So now I'm thinking about giving up on that too. It seems like therapy is unavoidable if I am ever to get over that hurdle.

So, does therapy actually work when you're feeling this messed up and overly self-aware? I tried it two decades ago, but it was just the usual CBT homework stuff, so I steered clear of it since then. And it seems like it's still the gold standard.