My dog, completely healthy and still looking like a pup at 9 years old, might have cancer and I'm just not handling this very well.

I'm 41. I've had dogs my entire life. They've all been special in their own way, but this one is extra special.

My wife and I adopted him after a family rescued him and found out they were severely allergic to him. The father had severe health issues and allergy medication could kill him so they had to re-home him, and they had tons of people interested. This puppy was pure cuteness.

But when we met Lucky (his original name that we changed immediately. He didn't even respond to it) we knew he was our dog. They gave us the dog and over $1k in supplies to help raise him for free. We kept in touch and sent photos until unfortunately the dad passed.

This dog has been my best friend. My wife's as well. I've never had a connection with another animal like I have with him. And animals love me. The thought of living in my house without him puts knots in my stomach.

I don't know what the point of this is. We don't even know if he has cancer. The tests are pending.

I'm just lost and hurt.

Fuck cancer.