24 [F4A] UK, With an ass like this, how COULD you stay loyal?

Come on, I saw you. I mean, how *couldn’t* I? It’s like your eyes were glued to watching my hips sway when I walked. And to be faair, this dress is a *little* tight… what do you mean you can see my thong..?

I wanna do ANYTHING that involves making your poor, poor wife/girlfriend deal with me and my giant fucking booty. She’s about to cry in the living room because i’m twerking on your face so hard she can hear the bed-springs of your lovingly-selected bed snapping mercilessly upstairs. Or maybe she notices my hand sliding lower and lower under the table at dinner until you’re sweating… Or hell, maybe she invites me over for a few days and doesn’t expect me to throw a giant, house-destroying party where me and a bunch of other girls take turns trying on her wedding dress and twerking until it’s broken?

I wanna hear your ideas. Fucked up as you want, just no scat (farts are fine) or pee. Everything else is fair game, time to take Homewrecker literally… <3