Im 27(f) and my husband 28(m) and i went to confession a while ago at our home church, he confessed first and when he walked out after me i noticed a weird feeling while talking to out father because to me confession never was held to a high standard with my husband. Confession to me means, a want to change or break the habit that keeps making you fall in hopes to not come back to confession again. My husband thinks we are all humans and we will sin again, it’s just in our nature, but God is all powerful and will forgive because he knows we are not perfect. I never liked this idea because it kinda takes away the feeling of working hard to break the sin and confession is just a place holder to make your self feel better and righteous to other people’s eyes. 

Well when he told me that our father actually didn’t grant him forgiveness because he needed to work on the sin it devastated him. I on the other hand felt so happy that our father was so strict and supportive of that fact that confession sometimes is never easy and that it’s deeper than what my husband said to him. “I sinned, and i didn’t want to, but i know it will happen again” it felt like he was sikeing out god. Well now since father didn’t grant him forgiveness he tried to stop sinning but he fails after a week or two. And it was a repeated thing it’s been a whole two months since his last confession and now he wants to go confess to our other church we go to. And tell the father what the other father told him. 

Is it bad that i feel like he’s avoiding the issue here? I don’t think theres any form of redemption here, it’s like why even confess? you’ll be here again in a few weeks or every month. its like confession is comforting you instead of working hard to fix the sin in hopes you don’t return to it again. Maybe im just too judgmental? Idk to me forgiveness is something that is supposed to confort both parties….how do I talk to him about this? he thinks im theologically wrong and im not sure how to approach an argument with him about it. He believes my sin is being hard to forgive and for being too hateful(wont dwell on that) help…

“I sinned I didn’t want to sin but I know it will happen again” words from a husband.