I think I'm depressed (more so than my normal)

My mood has been low for most of my life with occasional flare ups when it's been worse. I feel like I'm in a state or at least heading towards a state of depression I haven't been in before. There are so many things that are contributing to me feeling so awful, non of which I can do anything about and it's all getting too much. I've started using alcohol to try to numb things which is only the second time I've used this as a coping mechanism (the last time was last year and I ended up getting admitted to the mental health hospital, voluntarily). I have an appointment with my OT on Tuesday and with my GP on Wednesday but I'm not sure I want to mention anything as I don't see how they can help me.

Sorry, this seems to have turned into a bit of a ramble but any advice is very much appreciated.