Diagnosed 2 Months Ago, I Feel Like a Failure

Today marks 2 months of my (34F) ADHD diagnosis. I thought the medication was going to change my life like a magic wand. So far nothing’s happening.

- I still suck at my job (missing deadlines, losing money, anxious about the future)
- Intense Concerta crashes
- No one in my family / friend understands (nor are they interested)
- When I try to talk about it sometimes they look at me like its a make believe thing, like im pulling shit up my ass to try to feel special
- Husband gets it and tries to help, but he’s not as curious about it as I am (We’re also 10 months into couples counseling. Its going well but still taking up mental space and energy)
- 9 year therapist doubted and resisted at first, still dont feel comfortable talking anything ADHD with her because I can tell she’s not interested in researching more about it (she DSM 5d me)
- The longest to do list in the world still untouched
- I feel like a failure, like everyone has their shit together but me
- So many stray cats this year in my street, I can’t just look away and rescue work is so exhausting
- Financial worries (I would love to take a month off but that’s not happening lol)

When will it get better? Everything still feels like chaos and it sometimes feels like torture to get through everyday.