24 [F4M] #Serbia/Online -Seeking a protective, charismatic, empathetic man:)

Hey,

I’m going to proceed to write out a detailed, authentic, candid post. I want to lay everything bare, and hope I can find \*my person\*. I’m trying to be a better person these days, and I believe we all deserve happiness.
I am 24, originally from the UK, but in the process of relocating to Serbia, having been based here for a while now. I am hoping for an in-person relationship/dynamic of course, but distance is perfectly fine to begin with. Sometimes it’s inevitable. Please feel free to reach out, no matter where you’re from. You don’t just need to be here or elsewhere in Europe:)
So, a little more about me… I feel it’s important to say that A)- I am childfree and this will never be up for negotiation and B)- I like a little age gap, but please don’t message if you’re older than 35. I’m just trying to get on the right path nowadays with appropriate dynamics, and I just need to be surrounded by people with only good intentions. Repetition compulsion is very difficult. I should also be upfront (which I have no qualms with) and disclose the fact that there is a history of ‘trauma’ of sorts with myself, which you can read about on my profile. I want to stress that I am not asexual by any means, but I am a little inexperienced. I know what I like sexually, but I really, really want to make it clear that I absolutely cannot and will not be sexual straight off the bat. Please don’t make anything sexual instantly. Anything like this is too damaging and triggering right now; I am not in the right headspace to be sexualised or speaking sexually/doing anything sexual. I’m really not. I need to first realise that sexual things with someone else are not automatically going to be predatory, and that my freeze and fawn responses won’t be around forever. Once I’m comfortable with you and have continued to work through what I’m working through, this will change:) I’m happy to speak about this all.
Anyway, onto the funner and more lighthearted aspects! Ultimately, I would love to have a caregiver/ddlg-esq style of relationship. I’m hoping for something serious. And to be completely honest, because of the fact I don’t often feel my age right now, I would love to just be able to be explore ageplay a little with the right person- I feel it would be cathartic and freeing to just let go. I’d love to let someone have power and control over me (healthily, so that there is a consensual power ‘imbalance’/exchange’ wherein mine and your best interests are fully respected, wherein limits are respected and boundaries aren’t pushed. Most importantly, I need to feel safe. I need those emotionally satiating aspects, perhaps the most. I don’t want to have to act my age. I want to act like the carefree little girl I once was… and due to life events, there is a very strong, prominent need to be rescued and saved. Don’t worry, I’ve done this for myself. The gist of what I’m saying however is that I’ve always longed for this from someone else.
If you’re protective, possessive, fatherly, incredibly caring, nurturing, charismatic, vibrant and fun with a wicked sense of humour- you are already perfect. If you want someone to take care of, who craves this care and instruction and gentle dominance/stimulation/guidance, please reach out. I’m not into deeper levels personally i.e diapers for example, but I’d love to explore something like bedtime routines, maybe you could choose a soft toy for me or something? I love to be held, praised, and I’m incredibly ticklish, admittedly… so this is always fun to explore;p sitting on your lap with your arms around me and being cradled/rocked would be nice too.
What else?… I have a Psychology degree, a dog I love and miss who is back in the UK, I love to drink coffee and smoke cigarettes. Despite this, I take care of myself and have lost a load of weight this last year, so these days I look good and slim. I have several tattoos, and large brown eyes. I’m personally not religious, and I don’t mind if you are, of course. Naturally, I’m more stoic/reserved/sometimes a little melancholy. I love listening to Kino and Cigarettes after Sex, and the rain, sunsets, red wine and spontaneous explorations/adventures actually make me happy. I’m getting back to the gym, because I love cardio, and it helps quieten my overly-introspective mind. I love to write, and I’ve written poetry also.
Sorry I’ve written so much about me- as for you, I am open to pretty much anyone as long as the above is respected and cool with you. I hope I didn’t come across defensive in my post (trying to work on this also)- just hopped back on here as almost a last resort, because I can’t keep denying the fact I need to be in a dynamic where someone can truly take care of me and I am allowed to be in a headspace where I can let go and also trust someone enough to be myself but not get taken advantage of. Some days I truly feel a little broken, so a little care of any sort would feel so enriching. In return, you would have my trust, submission, smile, adoration. Additionally, it almost goes without saying that attraction is an important factor in any kind of relationship, so I’m more than happy to verify as early on as you’d like. I love voice notes too. And I’d love to feel like I’m yours. If you ask me if I arrived back home safely or ate or something for example, I will probably melt. I love to feel comforted, and because I’ve not really been properly in this kind of dynamic before, I may need a little help easing into it. Maybe I just need enough babying or spoken to in ways that make me feel small and blush (which I’d love). I’d love for us to have fun together- travelling, dates, cooking, gaming, drinking. Bonus points if you’d enjoy doing things like brushing my hair, reading me bedtime stories and helping me choose an appropriate time to sleep, tying my laces and helping me choose outfits. Holding my hand when we cross the street. Kissing my forehead and tucking me in at night. Treating me like a human. I can be somewhat indecisive, so to have extra input would be assuring and meaningful:p I’m not naturally very bratty either, and I don’t think I’d react well to stern/overly harsh punishments. We will talk about this all in due course, obviously. Coraline is my favourite film (easily watched over 50 times- rookie numbers)- we could watch this together.
We all have flaws, naturally. As previously mentioned, I worry I’m a little (unintentionally) defensive, I used to find it hard to look after myself (but I’m brilliant at it now) and as much as I always try to appear optimistic to people, I’m secretly a little more cynical/pessimistic lmao.
I’m open-minded and non-judgemental as a person. People come from all different stretches of life, and I’d be very interested to learn about you and get to know you. Just message if you feel we might align. Tell me about all of your interests, what different days of the week look like for you, what you are also seeking? I want you to enjoy yourself and get just as much out of the dynamic as me. Truly.
I guess that’s it, for now.
Looking forward to hearing from you:)