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I wondered how many of us do the same, and in this case im talking primarily about late transitioners/hons/anything that doesnt pass

As 4t culture goes, often we hrtrep until theres any hope of passing. Many of us do that by man/boymoding their way through life. However here I wanna talk about my own experience and goals, as realistic or stupid they may be it could create interesting discussion or takes below.

I started hrt about a year ago at 24, which makes me really late and a huge hon with no hope of passing as im also 6'3. Ive always found my niche as sort of uncomforming amab exterior as before I was repping and really didnt know/accept I was trans + never liked being gendered male or looking male at all while never identifiying with nonbinary or such

But that goes both ways, while I enjoy feminine cut clothes, theyre more like the same as many twinks in fashionscene such as vkei wear, theyre feminine but not extremely so. 

This already put me in a spot where passing isnt just impossible with my own flesh but also incredibly harder with my fashion taste. Especially as its gearing more scene-y rn and I dont have the body to dress ultra feminine

While being alternative and more unisex focussed it directly puts me in a spot where transitioning to pass is a far off dream, as often you need to already pass extremely well to do so in less traditionally feminine clothes/less revealing

Then theres what goes on in my brain. Why im on here and why you are reading this. Obviously im on 4t and I absolutely hate on theymabs and theyfabs, it directly clashes with how I present. 

If I dont wear or wanna wear hyper feminine clothes could be me being realistic about my body, or me giving up, who knows.

But this makes it pretty interesting, I refuse to fully girlmode while my "manmode" is just the non feminine pretty unisex clothing.

I hate on theymabs yet my presentation might be closer to that. I dont wear dresses nor do I wear bikinis or such..

Idk its an interesting clash of ideas that goes on inside of me.

What about you?

The amalgamation of cultures, goals, hope, cope and hrtrepping