24M | Almost finished college, and these 4 years taught me more about loneliness than relationships

I'm a 24-year-old guy who's almost completed his B.Tech from Amity Noida.

I'm originally from Western UP, and I've always been the kind of person who minds his own business. I'm a bit shy and definitely not the "go with the flow" type. Before college, I had only one relationship, which ended after Class 12.

When I joined Amity, I honestly thought college would be the place where I'd find someone special. Not because I was desperate, but because that's what you imagine college life to be like. I'm not a model or anything, but I think I have a decent face, a lean physique, and I'm around 5'8" (5'10" with shoes 😅).

As the years passed, my expectations changed. I went from wanting a serious relationship to thinking maybe even a short-term relationship or something casual would be enough. But nothing ever happened.

I don't smoke or drink, and my friend circle is very small. Sometimes I wonder if that made it harder to meet new people.

The truth is, when you're in your early 20s, you naturally crave intimacy, affection, and yes, sex too. I don't think there's anything wrong with admitting that. But wanting something and actually experiencing it are two very different things.

At one point, my friend and I even started going to clubs, hoping we'd meet someone or maybe gather the courage to approach women. We tried, but nothing worked out. Every failed attempt made us feel more disappointed and confused.

Looking back now, I don't even think we knew what we were actually looking for. Was it love? Validation? Physical intimacy? Or just the feeling that we weren't missing out on what everyone else seemed to be experiencing?

Today, my friend and I are still on the same page. We've almost finished college without ever experiencing the kind of relationship we imagined we'd have. It hurts sometimes, but it has also made me reflect on myself and on what I really want going forward.

Has anyone else gone through all of college without ever being in a relationship? How did you deal with it?