i feel like i dont even miss her anymore, i just miss having her

yes most times i want her back, but after manifesting for 2 months straight and seeing nothing budge in the 3d, I finally detached myself physically from looking at 3d. I got no social media nothing now and this is what I feel. I feel like I just want her back to know i can manifest something big like this, I’m slowly losing all my feelings and for an hour a day, I think its not too bad without her. It’d just be better if she’s here the way I want her to be not her old self. Idk is this detachment? i still want her back but then i do feel like what im saying here too.. idk what im feeling it feels contradictory i want her yes but sometimes i think do i?