AITA for wanting my grandmother to spend less time at our family cottage?
My great-great-grandfather built our family cottage in the 1930s. Over the years it was expanded and eventually passed down to my grandmother and her brother. Recently, my great-uncle passed away, and my great-aunt has admitted that she can't keep up with the property anymore and could really use the money from selling it. We completely understand her decision, but it also means this is the last summer at the cottage.
My grandmother's health has been declining for years. She has been prescribed exercises and physical therapy, but she doesn’t do them at all and her mobility has steadily worsened. She's been using a wheelchair for quite a while, and now she can't even make it to the bathroom on her own.
In previous years, we could at least get her onto her mobility scooter so she could spend time outside and enjoy the property. Now she isn't able to do that either.
Our family has always had a schedule for using the cottage because it has to be shared. My aunt's family has certain weeks, and my grandmother's side has others. This year, though, my grandmother decided she wanted to stay there for all of our family's allotted time.
Ordinarily, I wouldn't have an issue with that. The problem is that her care needs have completely taken over the common living space. There isn't a bedroom large enough to accommodate her equipment, so she stays in the middle of the living room/kitchen. Her commode is there as well, and that's where she uses the bathroom. A personal support worker comes to give her sponge baths, and more than once I've walked into the cottage to a naked grandma because the front door wasn't locked/closed.
I feel awful saying this because I know none of this is her fault, and I know she legally co-owns the cottage. But at this point, she can't really participate in the activities that made the cottage special for all of us, while everyone else has essentially lost the ability to enjoy the shared spaces during what will be our final summer there.
I'm not saying she should never be allowed to visit. I just wish there were limits on how long she stayed, or that there were a different arrangement that allowed everyone to enjoy the cottage during its last season before it's sold.
So, AITA for feeling this way
Posted Jul 13, 2026, 10:49 AM UTC