Giving up on the idea of friends

I think I’ve come to the realization that I can’t have anything nice in life. I’ve accepted this before but I’m always having this hope that maybe I’ll find someone that sees me for what I am and accepts me for it. I definitely thought that a relationship was going to make me better, give me purpose, but after failing to make a relationship even start I gave up. Now I tried making friends but even that seems impossible. Sure I’ve talked to some people but I don’t think it’s worth it. It’s not worth it for others to have to deal with me. I’m going to have to do this alone and I will stay with that. I’m going to accept it and just do everything alone. I’m going to do what I want when the time comes. I’m alone, I’ve been alone, I’m staying alone, I’ll die alone.