[F4A] Asian Identity

When people hear my name —Ella—they don’t picture an Asian girl. In the minds of many, Ella is the name of a blonde haired, blue eyed cheerleader. But I’m actually Vietnamese. Or at least, I was born in Vietnam, where I spent my first few months in an orphanage before my white parents adopted me and took me to the United States.

I grew up in a white family, with white siblings, in a mostly white community. Like most liberal minded, adoptive parents there was an effort to teach me about Vietnamese culture; the history of French colonization, the complicated legacy of Ho Chi Minh, the importance of Tet. But otherwise, I grew up like every other girl in my community; eating at Applebees, shopping at American Eagle, and, yes, being on the cheerleading squad.

I first stumbled upon DPP a few months ago; the classic story of being bored and horny and Googling and quickly falling down a rabbit hole. I was particularly intrigued by the volume of posts from Asian girls, many of them using the acronym WMAF (I had to go to UrbanDictionary to know what it meant). I found these posts to be intensely erotic and it stirred up a lot of questions for me about nature, nurture, race, and ethnicity.

I’m instinctively submissive to men. Is it because my adoptive father could be domineering and strict? Or is it because of a cultural expectation that’s hardwired into the genes of every Asian girl—even the ones who grew up in white families? Is it a combination of both?

I don’t know if any of this makes sense — but I want to discuss it with people who have similar experiences or insights into these cultural / sexual divides. I’m 20 years old and open to talking to anyone who has thoughts to share… but naturally, my fellow Asian girls go to the front of the line :)