Venting - Thanks Meta - Deleting Bad Friends Feels So Good

Is this a low? I had to cut someone out of my social media circle. I had already put the person in my jerk circle SM (filled with all of the people I went to HS with and who I feel similarly obligated to accept on SM) because I haven't seen her in a long time but I removed her last night altogether. This is not something I would write about or ponder on my identifiable SM but I do feel like venting. Don't let people use you for a false sense of superiority. Go with your gut and don't feed these people. Delete them fast!

We were tight as teenagers but things definitely changed over time and, especially as certain people are so thirsty to fit into, uh, majority America, they will stab you in the back without much thought. Even when we were tight, this person constantly treated me like I was lower than she was on the social ladder. My father was a civil servant with a great administrative job but she would speak about what he did for a living versus her family (ethnic food restaurant) like my dad was a maintenance man or something. As an adult, I definitely give this the side eyes. I don't make it a point to look down on people but will respond to pretentiousness and attempted snobbery. Treating a black man born with no wealth who created a successful, stable life for himself and his family like he was lower than food service workers is definitely an odd choice. This person also always made me step outside of her house before setting the alarm system. She explained that many people in their culture don't like using banks and they kept a lot of cash money in the house. As an adult, I can translate this to tax evasion. However, I know she wasn't asking any, uh, majority Americans to step out of her house before setting the alarm.

As grown adults, the first infraction was the person complaining that Amazon wrote a single letter on her package. Somehow, she interpreted this as the Amazon driver being racist against her family and marking the packages with that letter for their race. (Yes, that's absolutely a leap but there could be backstory. I know this person racked up a lot of credit card debt from shopping and student loan debt because she kept failing classes. She had worked in package delivery part time - not Amazon - until doing some kind of nude photoshoot for a previously trendy sport for $$ and then misusing a small business administration loan for her personal debts under the guise of starting an equipment company for this sport. In any case, I got the feeling she had backstory with the specific delivery driver although I don't remember exactly why.)

The person never gets much feedback on SM but those who responded asked why she thought the letter was about her race. I responded that if she really believed there was an issue with the driver, she could report it to jeff@amazon.com. I stated that, while rumored, I really didn't know if Jeff actually read the comments but the one issue I had with Amazon was resolved that way. (That was more than a decade ago - maybe two. FTR, I doubt Bezos read them then and seriously doubt he reads them now.) Some guy replied to my comment and called me an idiot for believing that. Frenemy responded along the lines of, 'I'll DM you about that person.' The whole thing left me feeling like I was the idiot...although we had a person saying that writing a single letter on a package amounted to racism (which, as a black person, I am sensitive to). Also, this person flunked class after class at her nonselective uni while I graduated from an Ivy, but I'm the idiot? In any case, definitely left me with side eyes.

Infraction that made me delete? It's definitely out of proportion with what happened in the past but I think as we grow, we are able to put everything together and see the people who aren't doing us any good. This person often posts pictures from events that she volunteers at. She's a clerical worker for a large company and they do a lot of volunteer work in my former area. She posted pictures related to World Cup - no, not from an official venue, so I'm not identifying. I responded, "Vive la France!" She deleted my comment. Okay, guess she doesn't like France. I then get an email from FB about a comment that her BFF made. When I clicked, her BFF posted on her own FB that she wasn't liking France "just because" their players are majority black, that people who like teams just because they're black and France's players are black are "idiots", and she was really hoping that Morocco "beat the Black off of 'em". (Thanks for pointing this out to me, Meta. Especially before I went to bed last night.)

I sometimes run into the BFF. Although we both live about 300 miles away from where we grew up, we both live in the, uh, state hosting France's World Cup team. When we were undergrads, I remember this person snapping at me after I drove her from our hometown to our college city (not here) and I asked her if she was okay when she wasn't really speaking. My frenemy explained what she did to become upset and I would rather not give that explanation, but the BFF moved here because she was dating someone who lost his job where I teach and he's now an adjunct instructor for my stepson elsewhere - small world. In any case, they posted pictures together from a restaurant here and I hope to G-d I never run into the two of them around town.