Want to medically transition soon but have far right family

So I feel like the answer is obvious like I’ve just got to live my life and go for it but I am terrified because I know it’s going to cause some rifts in the family to put it lightly. I mean not that I really LIKE these family members I just want to keep the peace for my own sake but it’s getting REALLY hard to put off my transition longer. I don’t like conflict and unfortunately, the far right has become really obsessed with trans people for some reason. I’m waiting until I graduate university at the end of next year, then I want to hopefully move to our state’s capital and pursue medical transition asap. For the record I’m not even out to them and I don’t know how those words will ever leave my mouth because right now it feels impossible. I know even my mother, who’s not far right but is ignorant on LGBT issues, will struggle with the he/they thing because she doesn’t get ‘they’ pronouns or the concept of being nonbinary. She also misgenders trans people who are GNC or I guess not trans enough for her and I just don’t really have the energy to deal with that? I mean right now I don’t engage with it because I’ve tried to explain it in the past and it doesn’t work. However when I’m the one who’s the subject of the conversation it won’t be so easy to just avoid questions.

I’ve tried to push the feelings down for a long time, until I’d moved out to somewhere where it was safe to pursue transition. I guess I thought when that time came, I’d feel naturally ready to come out. Well it’s coming up in like a year and a half and I feel no more ready than I did when I was 14 and first started identifying as trans. By the way I’m almost 26 now. I want to pursue top surgery and HRT as soon as I’m able to. I don’t know, I thought maybe with top surgery because I’m autistic I could just say “I didn’t really like wearing bras” or it’s a sensory thing. I mean I’ve been passing my binders off as sports bras for years and they bought that. The problem is, I want phalloplasty as well eventually and I don’t think they’ll buy that’s an autism thing, you know.

I guess I’m posting all this because I’m wondering, if you had family members like this then what did you do?? And by family, I mean my father and grandparents not like distant members. Although my father was abusive to me as a child (and also kinda as an adult but more emotionally than physically) so I guess the more reasons to cut him off the better. I know he’ll never accept me because he’s basically a neo-Nazi and I don’t just throw that term around, he’s genuinely the most hateful person I know IRL. I’m thinking maybe I should just start the medical transition without telling them then be like “by the way I’m transmasc and you can’t try and talk me about of this because it’s already happening”??

Yeah so what should I do in this situation? Or what did you do? Because I just don’t even know where to start. I guess I’m only worried about maintaining a relationship with my mother because she’s not all bad. She’s like a centrist who thinks we should all get along and respect each other’s opinions, if you get what I mean. It’s just that I don’t have any other family really.