What does it take to have genuine female friendships?

Ask Twenties :chat:

Please read the whole post or ignore it but do not start commenting random stuff without understanding what this post is about.

No, I'm not yet another example or typical male loneliness. I have a girlfriend of more than 3 years now and everything is great between us. We have jobs and we are not insecure about things. We have a common friend circle from college, which means people we kind of knew in college but got jobs in the same city and companies so now we are closer friends.

I miss my actual college friends, both guys and girls that went to different cities for jobs or went back home to handle family work. The girls who were my friends there were fun to be around, chill to talk with and hang out with. They were my bros. We used to bunk classes together, roam college campus and eat from everywhere. We even sat down in the library together and studied hard for placements. Now most of us are busy with our jobs in different cities and only talk on the phone mostly or meet once or twice at most every year where most of our time goes by in catching up. Don't get me wrong I had guy friends too and they are important to me aswell.

I thought of making new female friends in the city I work in(Bangalore) but I just don't know what to do. Most of my coworkers are senior and they have their own circle. I don't even fit in with them. And I have no idea how to make friends out of strangers.

Also, the thought that asking for genuine friendship can be seen as desperation for female attention. I tried to be friends with some guys from my gym, and around the apartment building I live in, but somehow everyone already has a very busy life and doesn't want new people in it.

The best that has happened is that my girlfriend made a few female friends of around the same age in the gym and I talk casually with them just hi and hellos. Now I am in Bangalore, mostly busy and next to no friends. I want to have genuine human connections again that I can have fun with, chill and hang out with, talk about life, bitch about things and whatnot.

I'm not asking anyone on this sub to reach out and be my friend either. I just feel the absence of good friends because I was lucky to have them at a point in my life where it mattered a lot. I just want to know, given how girls are tired of dealing with shitty and vulgar guys mostly, can I make genuine female friends that can just be good friends. Platonic friends who will listen to my rants and my jokes and my frustrations, and can talk about the same things with me. I do not seek any romantic relationship because I have it. But that is the thing, I don't want my girlfriend to be the only girl I can tell some things because she is the only girl in my life. There might be some things that I wouldn't talk to her about and it has nothing to do with her. I want to be friends with girls who can be my bros.

I don't know how much of this makes sense and how much of it sounds like bullshit so I'll leave it here.

Posted Jul 15, 2026, 12:45 PM UTC

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