I (23M) went through my gfs (22F) phone and now she won’t talk to me
Title pretty much sums it up. My gf and I have been dating for around a year now and things were going really well. We’ve been looking at apartments in a different city together and have built a small life together.
She comes over to my place almost every day. We alternate weeks at each others apartments so it’s more equal. The week this happened was a “my” week. So she had been coming over to mine a lot.
She just started a new job around a month ago. She’s very pretty and it’s a sales position so I knew she’d do well. She’s always complained about creepy men hitting on her at previous jobs, but at this new job it seemed to be every day.
She mentioned a coworker crossing boundaries a couple times and I guess I just let my insecurity get the best of me. I didn’t know her phone passcode, so when she came home from work and got in the shower, I guessed her computer passcode and it was the same.
I’m ngl I went through like everything. I found a couple photos of her with her exes and some sex tapes but they were all from years ago and weren’t in some like weird hidden folder. I went through her texts as well and didn’t find anything alarming.
I was going through her insta DMs when I looked up and saw her standing in the doorway butt ass naked looking at me.
She got pretty pissed and asked what I was doing. I kind of panicked and didn’t say anything. She snatched her phone out of my hand and started getting dressed and packing up essentials.
I tried to apologize and explain but she just kept saying “stop talking, I would never do this to you. You don’t trust me.”
She left and hasn’t talked to me since. This was three days ago. I’m not blocked or anything. I think she’s with her bff or something since she posted a story of her on a paddleboard on a lake. That just pissed me off more since she hadn’t been replying to my texts or calls.
This morning she sent a short text asking for space and that if I were really sorry, I would respect that request. She also said that we wouldn’t be moving in together for quite some time since I “obviously don’t trust” her.
How do I fix this? She’s my dream girl and I know that I fucked up, I just want her back home.
Tldr: went through my gfs phone, didn’t find anything. She caught me and will not speak to me now.
Posted Jul 20, 2026, 10:31 PM UTC · locked