I'm in love with my bsf

I'm a girl and so is my bsf. We have been best friends since we were babies. She's straight and I'm bi (maybe pansexual I'm not sure I'm still working it out). She's funny and kind and gentle and confident I love that abt her. And oh my she's beautiful. She just got a haircut and she looks unreal. I love how she sings and how she plays the piano and how smart she is. Knowing I can't be with her makes me wanna cry. She's so amazing. I trust her more than anyone and I'm close with her family. She's flawless (ig apart from the fact she's straight and doesn't love me romantically ahaha). We often say ily in a bsf friend but she doesn't know I mean it in a romantic way. I've dated other ppl before but I've never loved someone like this before.