i might be in love with my best friend and i don’t know what to do.

okay so this is my first time writing a post so give me grace lmao. i want to be vague just in case . so me (f) and my bsf (f) met in elementary school. ( entering senior year now)since we met we have always been affectionate to eachother. we have kissed before , we’ve cuddled, we hold hands and been touchy before. these things didn’t always make me feel a type of way until recently and i cannot help but feel disgusted with myself for her not knowing how i actually feel now.

btw she has a boyfriend but if it isn’t obvious she doesn’t mind girls either. just want to mention her bf treats her like shit and they have a 2 year age gap. he always makes her cry and makes her feel bad. in those moments of consuling her recently i just would be thinking if only you would let me treat you the way you deserve. i feel as if i keep looking at things that she means in a plationic way.

just want to add a couple of things in here. we have been talking about moving in together recently, we love being together and we have always wanted to live together.we agree on basically everything and we love all the same things so it makes sense to us. we’ve even discussed getting our own puppy. but recently i just have been viewing her differently.

im gonna be honest here she is very beautiful like everything about her is just perfect like she gets alot of attention and sometimes i find myself somewhat jealous, not bc of her looks but just the fact that gross men think that they deserve her. but my main thing is i dont even know what do to in this situation . i love my best friend and dont think i could ever really “ make a move”.( being fully honest here all things that have happened she has intiated ).

i am the type of person where communication and honesty is everything to me and she knows that so i dont feel right not being fully transparent with her. it doesnt feel fair or right . please give me advice on what to do in this situation bc i dont think thats its right to not be honest with my intentions.