20M bad situation with my first love 20F

I am using voice keyboard, so I’m sorry if it seems off. So it starts off with me(M/18 at the time) dating or I would say meeting my first actual love( F/18 at the time) in 2022 we started talking for a month or two then we started to date end of 2022. We were 18 when we met so this is all during high school little things would happen like I would see her staring at guys and one time I found in her Notes app“I don’t know why I’m holding hands with blank a.k.a. me I’m scaring the hose away.” other small stuff like that then it would be for me finding likes from other guys videos, etc her hiding stuff and sometimes her sister would send her popular thirst traps. then during prom era or 1 month before prom I’m a man to admit, there was a girl I used to talk to when I was 18but it was like a one month talking stage so I just like had a video pop up on my for you page. And all I did was snoop like see what she was up to. I didn’t reach out or anything like that but she saw that through my view history and then dumped me but we were still like talking like fixing things yk and we still went to prom together but during that time there was so many other small red flags that popped up so I decided like actually test her, I used one of my fake accounts to messageher and she entertained it. I’m not gonna lie. I was very flirty, but she didn’t flirt back rlly , but she was replying and she was kind of paint me as a kind of a bad guy like I didn’t let her be friends with some guy even though I just told her I wasn’t comfortable with that and honestly it’s up to you guys.if yall think she failed that but that’s just one of the few things and then that was 2023 summer like end of high school summer we were all right. It would just be a little arguments normal relationship issues nothing insanebut like it would just be kind of like me finding her caught up in her lies like just small lies and I was going through a lot at the time so a lot was adding up to me and I decided to attempt near like december and i was in a phsycward i scared her before she picked me up and took care of me after my failed attempt so i don’t remember most of the days but honestly ik treated this girl so well i used to pay for everything and she would fight me to pay that’s what i loved about her she was so caring and calm and so charming and cute everything about her i loved. i ended up attempting again, and I ended up in a psych ward after the three day hold was done I remember, bro I went over to your house and I found like messages of her dad and her sister in the group chat and they were talking about I guess from the context of the first conversation it was about her liking some guy at a store that she worked at later in this story and I remember walking out and I was crying because the timeline I would’ve added this up would’ve been like maybe me she saying all this while I’m in a psych ward, but even after that she explained to me that used to be some guy she used to like in like freshman year, but I don’t know why you would tell your sister that anyways, but honestly after 2023 I started a 2024 January we are breaking up and it was for good all the way up until 2025 summer we started to talk again but during that gap of 2024 early 2024 till you know mid 2025 I started talking to this other girl(F/18 ‘ 23-NB ‘she’s from the city things are cool. She lied to me about her age. She was 18 when I met her but then turned 18 like a couple days after ifykyk but I was like 19 still and she also lied to me about her having a baby. She told me that was her brother at first until three months or so of us talking. and it was very toxic at the end of like 2025 summer I started talking to my first original ex again and I stopped talking to the other girl I met. The other girl was very crazy and obsessive. She will come to my house she’ll stalk me and she had clues about me talking to my original ex again but honestly, I kind of distant myself. I didn’t end things I try to, but it would end me being like actually hostage she would sit on my car if I’ll try to drive while she would break my mirrors stuff like that very crazy and abusive and I was just tired of it. It was taking a very strong mental pull on me and talking to my original ex felt like a really nice breeze. We grew matured and learned and I really loved it, but like I said, I was just very distant in hopes that she would forget about me while I continue to talk to my original ex, but that wasn’t the case and again I’m a man to admit I did entertain it sometimes, but I would keep it very very very distant to the point we wouldn’t even talk for a month. She ended up finding out at 2026 March and texted my original ex sent pictures and I guess made it seem like I was talking to both of them at the same time when it really wasn’t that case anytime the crazy girl would call me or message me. I’d always ended off with “leave me alone.” they made a plan to set me up then they know I I was into clothes so my original ex told me she had a date idea she wanted me to style her and I believe that I brought a lot of my jeans and clothes very expensive then took me to a plaza asked to hold my phone to take pictures. Then the crazy girl came out of nowhere, pepper spray my face recorded me and ended up leaving me in the plaza no phone and stranded because my original ex was driving. Ended up blocked, but I did end up sweet, talking the crazy girl to buy me a new phone and giving me my clothes back my original eggs I did end up talking to her, but she’s very very mad at me telling me words I’ve never heard her say I’m my whole life and it was overall a mess took a big mental pull on me and I wanna fix things with her and I’m pretty sure the crazy girl made it seem like I was really talking to both of them at the same time. I just want advice. i need my girl back i’ve been messaging her on tiktok she would just end it off with saying to kill myself or fuck off and block me etc