Were you Always more or less Showing CPTSD symptoms that you Thought were Character defects, ......and then Decades Your Symptoms started to show up MORE........especially after You Started confronting the Abuse?

I could somehow really pull my shit together if I had to. I learned from my abuser to at least "Act normal". But then my life was falling apart, decades later. So I had to seek therapy, wondering why I'm there, but knowing I needed it.

Fast forward 10 years later with therapy. And I'm basically a shadow of whatever self I had glued together in order to function. The glue just started pulling at the seams, and now I"m a full fledged Trauma ridden basket case because I don't have the will, or energy to hide it anymore.