help please

New to stretching with questions

I've started stretching my ears, one is at a 5mm while the other is at 4mm (heals slower), I wait 2-4 months in between stretching but when I stretch it hurts A LOT but usually fades within a day. Is this normal?? What can I do about it, I did research and it just says im stretching too early, even though I'll wait months and im still at a small size?

I recently started using jojoba oil just 1-2 times a day, is there a specific way I should use it?