The steady decline in kebab portions is a global issue that bodes ill for the world’s economy.

Guys, hear me out..

I am an older fella, and I remember a time when kebabs were served in threes, and if they were particularly long, two kebabs at the very least, and that’s with a thick bed of Levantine bread, some roasted peppers, a sprinkle of chunky fries and half a grilled tomato for some reason.

And today…?

Today, wherever I go, be it Istanbul, Dubai, Phuket, Tampa, or practically anywhere else, I get served exactly one kebab per order. That’s it. A single fucking runty ass kebab. And don’t get me started on the tissue-paper bread they serve, or the lack of a single fucking garnish. Oh but they’ll give you some humus… in a goddamn Mcdonalds-style tiny ass ketchup cup. And you’ll pay an extra 2$ for it.

Fuck you kebab places. From Uncle Ahmed’s corner place to those fake ass high end Persian Joints, y’all hoarding the kebabs to what ends exactly? Would it kill you to lay another kebab next to that first one? Maybe bake your own flatbread? Add a fucking vegetable?