Can I get some perspective?

I have a 7 yo daughter and am finding this stage of parenting to very challenging generally. It's one of those seasons that feels more like a slog than fun.

Today we went to visit my 95 year old grandmother who just moved into a senior living apartment. It's an hour and half drive from where we live. There is nothing for a child to do in these environments so I came ready with coloring books and even packed a whole art/craft to do. My daughter adores crafts and could spend all day doing them.

I thought it would be really nice to color a picture or even make a magnet (the craft) to leave something on my Grandma's new fridge.

My Grandma sends my daughter a card every single holiday. She sends her large checks on her birthday and for Christmas.

My daughter was complaining about being bored (understood) but then also refusing to do the things I had prepared for her. We at one point were writing notes between us on a pad of paper and she said 'she will be okay without it' when I was pressing her to please at least make a drawing or color a page we could leave.

I feel my daughter has like a pathological need to oppose me sometimes. Anything I want, she will automatically not want.

She is a wonderful child. She is generally well behaved and easy going. Teachers always praise her. But this streak recently has me hurting and angry all the time. I feel this is a pattern I had with own mother and I do not want to repeat it.

My mother was very controlling which I do not at all feel I am. I give my kid a lot of freedom and room to make their own choices, which is why I'm disappointed AF in a lot of the choices I see her making lately. Like refusing to do something nice for a family member who spoils her.

I don't know what I want out of writing all this. I feel legit beaten down by the stubborn sevens. I just want to find a way to feel that pure accepting love towards my child. So much lately I feel hurt and mad and sad.