I keep thinking I can do this on my own

Mostly just a vent. This drug changed my life, history of binge eating disorder. I’ve been on 2.5mg for over a year now. Every 7-14 days. Never needed to go above that, lost 50 pounds and (while I’m on it) my BED is gone. It’s amazing. But, I do worry about the future. I struggle with guilt. I say okay this is my last shot, I don’t need this drug. Then have a major binge & realize I do need it. It’s between feeling so so grateful I found something that helps me and feeling weak. Worry about long term negative effects - even though locally I know binging on sugar is worse for me. I try to be strong and not need this medication, I feel lame that I do need it and that is helps so much, and also wish I would have found it 10 years ago so I’d have more healthy years