Feeling regrets though a video game

So l've been playing silent hill 2 recently again (because I never beat it) and it's been...... therapeutic for me. I know when some people play it they see things that they've experienced in their lives when it comes to trama or ptsd.
For me that's not the case, when I play this game it feels like I'm battling my own guilt and shame.

Back when I was a kid I've done bad things that I'm not proud of and I saw things that wasn't normal for a child to see. I've witnessed my mother being physically abused as well as being physically abused my self from my own step dad who left and was never seen again (thank god). But from that abuse that was brought onto me I did to others because | was so angry, hateful, bitter, ugly, and disgusted with myself.

I even hurt some people in my family because of this and I've been feeling awful about since (1 did apologize) and that's when I started play the game again.. This game is making me feel things that I've felt before but tenfold, each monster I fight feels like I'm fighting apart of myself and it's been liberating to say the least.

Especially the abstract daddy even tho that monster represents the sexual abuse Angela went through, I went through the verbal and physical abuse from not just my step father but from different people as well and fighting that monster and killing it not only felt like I was beating up the people who fucked with my mind as a kid but it felt like I was also beating myself up in the process who passed on the same pain.

This game is something different I've never played a game that turns your worst fears and guilt and shame into monsters that feel like they're apart of you. I almost want to visit silent hill irl just to see if I can find some peace