What is wrong with me.

I used to do self harm to myself like cutting but I stopped about a year+ ago. A lot has happened since then and my mental health has gotten so bad, I got help and was put on medication and I’m doing better but no amount of medication can fix my relationship with my dad. I’ve gotten so mad or just upset that I hit my fist against my thighs to try and get bruises to blow the time, i didn’t even know that was a form of self harm.

I just wish things were normal again