Is it normal to me to feel like a failure?

I’m a trans man and I’m 19, I haven’t started hormones because I live in a very conservative Caribbean country (but, hopefully, I’ll start soon).

I finished high school, i work from home in customer service and my only support it’s my mom and some online friends since my father is not present and my moms family is very religious.

But I finished high school 2 years ago and haven’t enrolled in uni, I don’t go out with irl friends, I had to move with my mom to another place because I was being targeted for being “too masculine” and this place is smaller to where I lived before.

I feel like a failure, I have so much dysphoria that I can’t even go to the mall without feeling grossed out about myself and I’m not doing really well at my job. I keep thinking that when I start hormones it’s gonna get better but sincerely I’m too depressed about this whole situation.