Advice: Academic Disappointment

So to start off, I grew up in a Christian home. I am a believer, meaning I do believe in Christ.

My parents are good to me. Theyre great. Im blessed and also..privileged in comparison, I dont take them for granted.

Now, to the matter at hand. Academic achievement has always been valued and pushed in my home. Plated with the word of God. Philippians 4:13 has always been a moto.

Lets just say, my academic journey in university has been a different matter. It's taken me longer than the required 4 years to just get my bachelors.

I suppose in a way my parents expected more from me as I didnt really have any academic struggles in high school. I sort of just coasted.

Im in my final year, Im supposed to be graduating next year. Thats what everyone is expecting. But Ive let them down, I've let myself down.

I failed a compulsory course that was needed to graduate. That means that I will have to retake it...and stay back for another semester, which would be another year.

I shouldve known this was going to happen. This is my fault. I failed myself.

My mother never fails to remind me of John 15, that outside of the vine, I can do nothing.

I had called her just before the exam of that course I failed to ask her to pray for me and she brought up John 15.

I will admit. I had it coming. I wasnt as faithful as I shouldve been this semester. Yes I went to church and all, but my relationship with God wasnt what it shouldve been. And no amount of desperate praying or begging around the exam period was gonna save me.

I blame myself for that. The thing is, I feel like I cannot come back to God. I cannot pray to God about this.

By extension, I will also have to break the news to my parents about my failed course.

Im such a disappointment. Truly.