Day 5 - Told my partner

Hey guys,

I made a post a little while ago about wanting to get off this crap. My story was similar to a lot of other people, I had a bad habit and hid it from the lady I love. My plan was to originally get off with strips during a week she was away. This didn't pan out, and I failed. The failure made me realize that in order to beat this, I have to be honest with her no matter what her reaction would be. When she got back, I laid everything out on the table and told her I believed that I needed an inpatient rehab to set myself up for success (multiple relapses after successful quits).

I knew she wouldn't take this well, and I was right. Almost immediately, she affirmed that she would be leaving the 7 year relationship. We have officially broken up, but I started to prioritize my needs and health.

I checked into a detox last week, and successfully completed the 5 day program. I was discharged yesterday, and genuinely felt great. This week, I will be headed up to a 30 day rehab to work on myself and figure out why the hell I did this to myself. My goal is total sobriety for at least a year before even thinking about trying any marijuana or less nefarious substances. I'm not sure if I'll be a 100% sober guy or not, but this 7oh shit has proven to be the demise of my entire adult life I've built for myself.

Day 5 off of a 500-750 mg per day habit. I strangely feel okay all things considered. The heartbreak is worse to deal with than any of these shitty symptoms. I respect her choice, but part of me wishes she could've stuck it out with me. Our relationship wasn't perfect by any means, but I know if I was given the chance to get clean, I could conquer any relationship issues we had way easier. That's life I guess though.

Good luck guys, there's a light at the end of the tunnel. I know I'll never be touching this shit again, obviously because of impending legality lol, but also personal choice.