Family problems with moving and drama

I need advice, I’m writing this in notes before I’ll copy and paste into Reddit. Sorry if there’s any confusion, I’m not the best at explaining. I genuinely don’t know who to go to.

So, one side of my family who we’ll just call them the TT side; they want me to come to a different state and move in with them. Their reason is because my mom is psychotic which she is. And she’s kinda implanting a lot of her habits on me, like house jumping if that makes sense.
I’ve only pressured to move out of the house I’m in now (with my mom) but I realized I was pushing it and stopped. <- that was a couple months ago.
I have severe chronic depression, that’s caused by my family, stress and life in general.
But anyway, they want me to move to a complete different state to live with them. My reason to not move? The current state I’m in is like my HOME. I’m more comfortable in this state, I’m more familiar here. Not only that, I have a boyfriend who I want to have a life with here.

They’re ‘worried’ if I don’t move to a different state and/but move out of the current house I’m in (and stay in this state) is that she’ll still somehow find me, which I know that. I know she’ll stalk me, but if she continues I’ll probably get a restraining order against her (in the future)
They also say that if my boyfriend disagrees or doesn’t want me to (and I don’t even want to) that I should break up with him.
Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 5 years, almost 6 now. We’re planning on getting engaged when we eventually get our own place, and get married.
The TT side of the family is also extremely Christian, in a way it makes me uncomfortable because I have complete different beliefs, including political. My boyfriend is also POC, and I already feel like they’ve treated him differently because of that.
I also feel like a big burden to that family, I feel like a big burden to both sides of the family. Why would I want to live with several people who make me feel like such a massive burden? (This includes the family I’m already living with which we’ll call the MM side of the family)
Both sides I feel like I wouldn’t function properly in a living space.
When I tried tell TT side of the family that I don’t want to move to a different state, possibly be forced to break up with the love of my life and feel so out of place; they kinda freaked out. Had a melt down basically.
No, I didn’t tell them I feel like a burden to both sides of the family. No, I didn’t tell them I’ll be uncomfortable and feel so out of place either way.
Not to mention if I’m forced to break up with my boyfriend, my depression will just get severely worse and I feel like they don’t care.
A quote from the TT side of the family: “if you move and still feel this way your just self inflicting it”
And that really pissed me off.

Side note: both TT side and MM side of the family don’t like each other, they used to but I don’t think it was real. More so temporarily tolerance. I feel like I’m in the middle of a custody war

I don’t know what to tell them, I’m scared if I do tell them how they would react. Anyone got any advice?
I’ll update below if anything comes up or I feel like clearing some things up or adding on.