Why do I still want to live?

I don't know if this subreddit is befitting of this question but I don't know where to post this.

I am done with myself. I'm a horrible person. But for some reason, I can't find the will to end it all. I don't know why I feel like I still have meaning in my life. I just ask, why don't I have the will to do that? That is all I ask, just why I still have the will to live.