How do you navigate an engagement that supports zina?

Pre-Nikah

I’m a 22y old and my fiancé is 21y. We have been engaged for about 3 months and the wedding is in 3 months, we’ve known each other for a year and a half. He’s everything I have ever wanted in a man. Kind, caring, supportive, comes from a good family who love me a lot as well. When we met, I made it clear that I didn’t want to engage in haraam actions before marriage but he is always initiating something when we meet. I moved to his state to complete my studies so I live alone and he comes over to drop off food his mom made or gifts from his family. And he always initiates something, it’s led to actions I deeply regret but he seems to be so apologetic afterwards. I won’t give away too much but we never had actual intercourse. In Ramadan I tried to be more firm with my decision to have no physical contact but that was ignored too. He always says “last time, last time” and pleads with me until it happens. He doesn’t get angry or irritated, just keeps asking. A part of me knows what I’m dealing with, but at the same time I’m battling to think that I might lose out on a good man and marriage if I leave. Every other aspect of our relationship is perfect and I don’t think I would find someone as loving as him. I also feel that maybe he is just young and naive. I would appreciate some feedback on how to navigate this, jazakallah.

Posted Jul 29, 2026, 12:57 PM UTC

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