Is there a clever way to find someone true personality in AM?

I am going through this process and I am afraid of forming trust cause what if they are just putting up show and later down the line turn out to be fake.

People say, hey take times, look for signs, I am sure doing that but there are people who can pretend to be nice till every point and in AM you only get chance to meet bunch of times, or even less if you and him are in different cities.

I tried love marriage but I am not good looking enough for it. I never been asked out b a guy in my entire life. The amount of times I rarely get matched is lesser than my fingers. So I settled down for AM, at least family won't complain this way (no my family isn't forcing, they will only marry me if I am okay with it) and I didn't have good experience with dating apps.

I just want someone who is kind and understanding, and doesn't have secret gf or has manipulative gas lighting behaviour or doesn't get manipulated himself. i seen so many men who trusts outsider words and turn their wives into villains in their stories. anyway clever way to test this.

So far I could think ab