Fuck it, I never wanted her to feel claustrophobic anyway

Honestly, my feelings, what I want, what I feel, my emotions, my love for her. All of it is so heavy. Im sure she feels suffocated with it. For her at this point. I think it’s as simple as. If she doesn’t want it. She doesn’t want it. That’s it. That’s the end. I never wanted to force anyone to love me. Which is what is happening here, I had to beg her so much just to give me another chance, just to see me differently, just to see us differently. That doesn’t matter when she has just decided No means no. Everything else is just FORCEFUL. Fuck. I just wish it wasn’t this way. But it is. This is how she feels now. It’s her brain, her feelings, her love to give, her love to take. It’s about what she wants for herself and that is NOT ME. NOT MY LOVE. NOT MY REQUESTS. NOT MY EMOTIONS. NOT MY LOAD. ITS NOT HER PROBLEM, ITS MINE. She can’t see it and she has decided to deal with her life on her terms, she sees a happier better future for herself with another path. She should definitely choose that. Of course everyone should. Our brains are not vibing together, shes stuck on moving on from me and I’m stuck on her. Wow. Really painful. Fml.