Is this normal for toddler meltdowns?

I don’t know if I’m looking for advice, reassurance, or just solidarity. My 29 month old’s meltdowns have reached an all time high. We can do absolutely nothing right, everything is wrong. We did recently have a new baby who is 5 months old now so this has been a big transition for our older son. I’m trying to keep that in mind but this week I just feel like my patience and ability to regulate myself has been at an all time low.

He’s always been an extremely early riser (he’s usually awake by 5-5:30am) but the last week or so he’s been waking up before 5. We’re trying to do the red light/green light training with his night light, but he’s young enough that he doesn’t 100% get it so it requires us to stay awake watching him in the monitor and constantly reminding him that the light hasn’t turned green yet so he has to play quietly in his room. This morning he woke up right before 5 so we just got up with him but it was instant tantrums from the moment he walked out of his room. He usually recovers pretty well, it was just one thing after another this morning.

My husband and I both work full time outside the home so our boys are in daycare. My toddler seemed in a good mood by the time we were heading out the door but I have a friend who’s son is in the same class and she called me after dropping off her kids to tell me my son was having a really hard time, kicking and screaming. We have loved the daycare up until this point. He did great in the infant and toddler rooms and those rooms don’t seem to have as much staff turnover. A lot of the same teachers aren’t still there with our 5 month old. Anyway, queue the working mom guilt.

I’m lucky enough to work for a school that has an incredible early childhood program and offers staff tuition remission starting at 2 years old so he will actually be starting at my school in the next couple of weeks. We have very small teacher:student ratios so I think the smaller class size and really intentional instruction will be great for him. It just feels like we constantly walking the tightrope of “is this developmentally normal? Is there something we can do? Should we talk to his pediatrician?” This week has been particularly hard and I feel like I’m failing him somehow.