parenting situation, emotional neglect.

hi all
this is my first post here and i’m hoping i’m posting in the correct subreddit i’m just really in need of some advice with an ongoing situation with my parents that has been really affecting my mental health. this is a long story so i might accidentally leave some stuff out but feel free to ask me anything:)
(tw- SH)
just for context im 18M

this all started in february of 2025 were i was talking with my mum about a job application that i had applied for. she asked me about the drug usage policy and i explained it. she then asked me if i had smoke marijuana before i said that i have a we had a small talk about it and after that we didn’t mention it.

now after st patrick’s day, i was at the pub with my gf and i got home late, past her curfew and woke her up (bedroom is next to front door) and she came to my room yelling at me, and i was apologising profusely to her. that night, (night after st patrick’s day) mum and dad sat me down had a very long conversation. basically the most notable thing was her saying she’s going to start drug testing me.

fast forward a couple of weeks mum had came home furious from work and that night she came into my room and asked me the last time that i had used marijuana, i told her a couple weeks ago (which was after st patrick’s day) and she basically went on a full monologue
but a tldr is saying that i am banned from driving, (being in australia we have very strict drug driving laws) and that she’s “done with me”.

i feel constantly monitored and a loss of independence, with frequent calls and texts from my mum asking where i am, who im with, when ill be home etc whenever im out doing something. i was camping with some friends, and we were on a night walk, and my parents were at home stalking my location on my phone , calling me repeatedly and texting me saying what we are doing is not safe and is very dangerous (bare in mind we were on a trail and had a flashlight).

since then, arguments and lectures have become a lot more frequent in my household, to which i understand but not to the degree of what it is. my dad often comes into my bedroom in the morning and starts yelling at me saying my room is messy, (when it’s objectively not)

i feel like they are never open to changing their minds about things. one morning i was getting ready for golf and my dad and i got in a heated argument about it. at the time, i was unemployed (due to me coming back from a long backpacking trip in europe) and he was asking me how im financing it and how i never do anything around the house. which isnt true but whatever, i then asked him what jobs can i do and he says that isnt the point and how i should already know what to around the house.

i also brought some melatonin pills back home, declared and everything at customs, for myself and a friend but she found them and started screaming at me about what im doing is highly illegal and threatened to hit me, and took both mine and my friends and when i asked for them back she said i sounded like a ”druggie”

all the time at home the feeling is always so tense and i feel constantly like im walking on egg shells, becoming hyper vigilante on what’s happening around me. for example i was having dinner and i said thanks to my mum and she ignored me and i said it again and she gave me this disappointed look and i was thinking like oh no wtf did i do this time, couldn’t eat, started shaking subtly, then like 2 minutes later she was acting normal to me. just these little things is genuinely fucking me in the brain and i’ve sometimes had thoughts about hurting myself.

and there has been a bunch other stuff like shit talking my friends but those were the most notable events. but all in all this whole situation is fucking with me like i’m scared for when my parents come home because i’m scared of what they have to pin me for.

i’ve started to feel depressed and anxious and i feel alone at home because i can’t feel like i can talk to them and they continuously ask if everything is ok but i just don’t feel comfortable speaking with them. i’ve spoken with my gf’s parents about it and a GP to which i got a referral for a psychologist.

so that’s my situation in a nutshell. feel free to ask me anything to further your understanding of it all, all advice is appreciated and if anyone wants to share similar experiences feel free too .
thanks for reading this very long post:)