I Got My Acting Results And I’m Not Happy

So for context, I attend Identity School of Acting in London. I have been enjoying my time there and it was the reason why I moved to London before I even auditioned for it. It was actually because of Damson Idris’ performance in Snowfall that I decided to attend the school after I found out he attended as well. Ironically enough, two months into moving to London and still postponing auditioning for IDSA, I bumped into Idris at a restaurant and he gave me advice on the school.

Anyways, I went home that night and paid for my audition. When they gave us the script, I did a deep character analysis and text analysis and lo and behold, I got in AND I was placed in the higher level.

I’ve been attending the school for a good few months now and as I said, I’ve been enjoying my time and really developing as an actor.

Our last module was In House Presentation (IHP), and at the end of this module we had to perform for a panel and this would be graded and we would be placed in different groups for the next term:

1. Tier 1 (the highest group)
2. Advanced
3. Intermediate/Advanced
4. Intermediate
5. Foundation

The grades are based on:

Ownership of Space
Presence
Connection
Vocal Clarity
Embodiment of Character.

To get into Tier 1, you’d have to have mostly all 9s.

I got my results today and I was placed in Intermediate/Advanced and this broke my heart. I got 7-9 points for everything else but ownership of space. I was 1 point off to being in Advanced. I wrote an email to the school because we’re allowed to voice if our performance should be reassessed, and I explained to them that I did own the space I was in. I took advantage of everything and followed my scene partner around the given space, however, because it’s not my character’s bedroom, I only dominated the space by interrupting it (for example; throwing a book on the floor with the intentions of annoying my scene partner because she’s a very clean and organised person).

This is their definition of Ownership of Space:

Are you alive in the space, grounded and moving freely with your impulses? The ability to be physically
present on stage, screen and in the studio; to maintain a sense of entitlement , the right to be there. To be
clear in thinking and grounded energetically when performing. To stand and grow in silliness to propel the
character to the next moment. The ability to change the colours, tension and drive a scene on entrance,
events and exit.

I began the scene very jittery, lively and excited because my character had some gossip to share, meanwhile my scene partner began the opposite way because of her negative feelings towards my character. I left the scene with a whole different energy—I was furious, defensive and prideful.

I was physical in the space by moving from one place to another and even following my scene partner around (also for context, my scene partner for Advanced). I was sitting and I was standing, basically doing everything possible in the space.

I maintained stillness as much as possible and in the given circumstances when we both reached our breaking point before I sat back down.

I think I did everything right, so I emailed them to explain that I did in fact own a space that wasn’t even mine to begin with.

I just feel very low and upset about it. I know I sound like such a loser complaining about it but I really gave it my all. My tutor was extremely impressed and so were my classmates, so seeing and hearing my grade was kind of disappointing to all of us, including me.

But yeah, just wanted to rant about that.