Has grief warped my entire perspective?

The end of April this year, a close friend of mine (I'll just refer to him as A) unfortunately decided to take his own life and it was entirely unexpected and devastating.

When I first received the news, I was immediately sent into a downward spiral of panicked, depressive thoughts in regards to how nobody saw it coming.

For context, I moved out of state and live in a different time zone than everyone back home, so I had missed some major life updates that had gone on with A earlier that week. He had been laid off from his job, and within days his relationship also abruptly ended.

One of those things happening is enough to throw someone off course a bit, so learning that those two things had happened back to back was a bit heartbreaking to hear. as A was pretty reserved when it came to his struggles with depression, he wasn't usually the type to open up about things in his life that are tormwnting him. unfortunately he didn't want to feel like a burden on his best friends or family so he suffered in silence until he passed.

I am uncertain if I am delusional from my own grief or what, but it seems like at least every other week since I am introduced to news of another person committing suicide. So far, all of them that I've come across were men, and it just caused a pit in my stomach for some reason that I cannot place.

In the case of my friend, he didn't leave behind a note or anything but it was reasonable to conclude that compounded major life stressors played a significant role in the timing of his death.

In 2021, the boyfriend of my friend S shot himself in front of her and she called me shortly after calling 911 and the initial event while processing it happening, and the way he carried it out and his words to her in his last moments were both some of the most traumatic things, I had just seen him in person days prior and he seemed completely stable and even happy, so the drastic shift S saw in him before he died sounded like she was describing an entirely different person.

Please excuse me If I sound nuts, I struggled to thibk of the best resources to inquire about this and I thought maybe there was a chance someone has been through what I'm currently experiencing before.