From straight to straight (with an exception)? And boy crazy at 38?

I'm 38 years old and 9 months into transition, 7 months on estrogen, 3 months on progesterone.

I've been trying to figure out my sexual orientation, because this has been the most unexpected part of transitioning. Pre-transition, I identified as a straight guy - never kissed a guy, never really attracted to guys. I was fully expecting to transition and be a lesbian.

On actually transitioning, turned out very much not to be the case, with at first being surprised to find I'm into guys, then sort of testing out a few months ago actually having sex with a guy to see if I was "really bi" (turns out, very much yes).

But in the past week or two, basically all I can think about are men and getting railed. It is weird being a 38 year old professional and trying to do serious work and feeling like a horny teenage girl, lol. And I did end up getting railed *hard* this weekend, for like 30 straight minutes, and finished inside, and OMFG was it amazing and I've been daydreaming about it since and treasuring being sore from it.

But I've been realizing my sexual orientation has swung around so hard, I'm basically only into guys and have lost all sexual attraction for women, with one exception. I've been married for 7 years (we're poly, no cheating here), and I'm still very much into my (pansexual) wife - my attraction to her has been completely unaffected by my sexual orientation swinging so hard around, and I still want to do very gay things with her.

Has this sort of been anyone else's experience? And anyone else dealt with the awkwardness of trying to do serious professional work and all you can think about is being bent over and railed? And how the sweet fuck did I think I was a straight guy 10 months ago? (I started transitioning as soon as my egg cracked.)

I also really, really wonder what I would have thought in September 2025 if you told me I'd be writing this post out...