Most disastrous polycule drama of all time??? [ASOIAF Spoilers]

Spoilers from The Mad King stageplay, that I didn't watch, because I'm from a poor country 🫠🫠🫠

So there's this polycule that's so disastrous half the realm died.

We got the Crown Prince Rhaegar Targaryen, married to Princess of Dorne Elia Martell. Elia also has a paramour, Ashara Dayne, a bannerman house to House Martell. Ashara Dayne has her own paramour, Brandon Stark, heir to the Lord Paramountcy of the Kingdom of the North. So this is all consensual because the Dornish are apparently libertine or something. (Orientalism eh. Dorne is still my favorite Westerosi region.)

So Elia has this plan for her husband to overthrow his father, King Aerys, who is considered an unpopular king. The thing is tho that Rhaegar has a thing for Lyanna Stark, who is the sister of Brandon Stark. She apparently likes him back. Elia consents because Dorne and Targaryen non-monogamy or something. (House Targaryen is slightly notorious for both non-monogamy and incest, consensual and otherwise...) Apparently, Elia's marriage is one for duty and Rhaegar and Lyanna is one for love.

Problem is that Lyanna is betrothed to Robert Baratheon, the young Lord Paramount of the Kingdom of the Stormlands. Robert's parents died in a tragic shipwreck during a storm. King Aerys consoles Lord Robert with a model of a ship that his parents died with. How thoughtful... And it's a box of water and splinters. So this whole Baratheon–Targaryen house relations is kinda south.

Robert also has a whole homoerotic tension with his foster brother Ned Stark when they were both fostered at the Vale of Arryn (another kingdom) under Lord Paramount Jon Arryn. The thing is tho, gay marriage isn't a thing in either of their cultures, so Ned had pressured his sister Lyanna (with support from his father) to marry Robert. It would be a powerful alliance after all, since it would tie together two (of the nine) Great Houses. Lyanna don't want Robert tho, because he's a chronic womanizer and a habitual unethical non-monogamy kind of person.

... Only for homegirl to get into a polycule that ties three of the great houses (Stark, Targaryen, Martell). Well, Elia and Lyanna hit it off. Rhaegar and Lyanna have a special connection because they can Zoom each other through dreams. (Didn't even know dragon dreams and green dreams ran on the same protocol...)

Problem is, Robert isn't too happy about this. Neither is Lord Paramount Rickard Stark and his heir Brandon Stark, who demand from King Aerys the return of their sister. Aerys arrests Brandon and Brandon demands a trial by combat with his father as the champion. The King's champion is... Fire. So Rickard fights fire and burns to death while Brandon tries to save him and dies trying. So now it's war...

So before that, Rhaegar also has a gay best friend, Jon Connington, who is totally into Rhaegar. They keep having this will they won't they thing. Also, Ashara Dayne also flirted hard with Ned Stark. Imagine being invited into this fuckass polycule and you find out big bro and lil sis are already in it. I'd die of shame, yet the Starks are built different.

Yeah so the war, known as Robert's Rebellion, is so bad half the realm dies or something. Three Stark, THREE STARKS, are in this fuckass polycule and the entire confirmed ENM part of the polycule dies, which are:

Brandon Stark—Ashara Dayne—Elia Martell—Rhaegar Targaryen—Lyanna Stark

I'd add Ned Stark to Robert Baratheon and then to Lyanna but the betrothal broke off. Ashara could have been a hinge to Brandon, Elia, and Ned, but that's not too confirmed. Then Jon never got it on with Rhaegar, so Rhaegar couldn't be the hinge to Elia, Lyanna, and Jon.

This is like some r/polyamory kind of drama. Help.