I feel like I betrayed my ex by telling our school counsellor

My ex (18M) and I (17F) go to the same school.

Even though we broke up a while ago, we're still very close and care about each other a lot. We talk often, and he's opened up to me about things he hasn't told many other people.

Over the past few months, he's started using hard drugs after years of refusing them because of pressure from his dad, who also uses drugs. He also has schizophrenia, which makes me even more worried because I know stimulants can make it worse.

There have been multiple nights where he's called me at 3–4 a.m. while intoxicated. He's thrown up, had an extremely fast heart rate, passed out, and one night I genuinely thought he had overdosed because he became unresponsive.

He's also told me that whenever he thinks he's close to dying, he wants to spend his last few minutes talking to someone he loves. Apparently that's me.

On another occasion, he called me saying he wanted to kill himself.

I reached a point where I felt completely out of my depth. I'm 17, and I felt like I was carrying all of this by myself. So I spoke to my school counsellor.

I was really hesitant to tell her who he was because I didn't want to betray his trust, but eventually I did. She said they would check in on him.

I had another appointment today and she told me they'd spoken to him. Obviously she couldn't tell me what was said because it's confidential, but she reassured me that he has a support network and that people are aware of what's going on.

Now I'm second-guessing myself.

Part of me feels relieved that another adult knows and that I'm not the only person carrying this anymore.

The other part of me is terrified he'll find out it was me and feel betrayed or hate me for it.

I genuinely wasn't trying to get him in trouble. I was scared that one day I'd answer another 3 a.m. phone call and he wouldn't make it.