day 1

i realised the timings matter. after last night post’s, i almost texted him. i wanted to find a way to reach out, blur the lines. im glad my friend talked me out of it.

today i went for a walk. a long one with music in. i pictured myself bumping into him. i wanted to look good. maybe thats why i went for a walk, to get some workout in.

ariana’s album comes out in 2 hours, thats good. thats something to look forward to. the lyrics would probably make me think deeply of him again though.

i read through our texts this morning and last night. it feels so weird that time passed that quick. i didnt even have enough time to appreciate it yet. theres some nostalgic feeling and missing of the person. then it becomes sadness because you no longer have that. ur memories r whatever that is left. no new ones.

i learnt how i couldve communicated a lot better, keep my emotions less petty. theres really so much room to grow & discover myself better.

i might post a tiktok today to see if he watches it. not just because i want to see his name but maybe because im trying to be happy too.