Not sure Ketamine really helped me?

I did three K sessions as prescribed, and initially the results were mixed. Did feel more calm, less anxiety, but also a lot more dissociation. So I'm 50/50 on whether I want to do it again. Can't decide if it helped or hurt.

It's been 11 weeks since my third and final infusion, and my mood has become sad and hopeless. It's summer, nothing is terribly wrong, yet I find myself feeling defeated.

I get 6 sessions per year, my next is in Sep. I'm tempted to ask if they have availability in Aug.