Seriously though, Green, Black, whatever, they’re mostly all bad people and the common men and women are the victims in this 1%er war caused by the most powerful, privileged, and well off people in the realm, but Cole really sucks, dude. I’m bummed they didn’t include the “I’ll have no songs about how bravely you died, Kingmaker…” line, but if Criston Cole’s undignified, sudden, and random death leading to him bleeding out dirty and in common clothes, in a field of corpses did not deliver the message of “this is NOT a man you should admire or try to be like” idk what possibly could. It’s as close to on the nose as George’s writing gets.

Book Cole is still a prick and honestly, not THAT much different, but he is less pathetic and he gets multiple opportunities to show us he is the best warrior in the realm. It makes his existential crisis upon seeing a dragon in a battle, the first enemy he’s completely helpless against, make more sense. He probably did hook up with Rhaenyra in F&B as well and it probably did lead him down his route, but he wasn’t as pathetic seeming, angry and bringing it up every second he can. The show has him continuously losing, winning through dishonorable tricks, or just murdering innocent, un-armored, and surprised men to death and then needs to tell us he’s the best. “Show, not tell.” Writing 101, showrunners and writers, come on. The man was not a good person whatsoever though. He is so misogynistic and incel, basement dweller mentality in the show and specifically with his hatred for Rhaenyra (a hook up once that he can’t get over nearly two decades on I guess) and let’s that guide all his bullshit. He hates Rhaenyra for even suggesting he be “her whore” (what?) and then just is that for Alicent, only Alicent doesn’t even seem to particularly like him as a person, as you wouldn’t.

This season? He’s fine or just indifferent to his men raping common women, not even bothered. He brings all his men along for a suicide run, not even fully revealing that’s what he’s doing. Gwayne parcels it out, but the rest assume he has a plan of some kind. Then he’s given no dignity in death.

In case anyone was unaware as well: Criston Cole was introduced in the main books as a cautionary tale for Jaime. Like a “this is the kind of person you’ll become if you remain the “Kingslayer” and continue getting worse.” He has never been a character to admirer, he’s who Jaime realized he COULD become if he doesn’t become better.

He was never even decent (and again, most on both sides aren’t) and he seemingly just continued to spiral. He bled out in a random ditch, no songs about his death, forgotten by the common folk during the main series and seemingly, outside of the Kingsguard, pretty forgotten overall.

Good riddance, buddy boy. Fabian Frankel is great though. I hope this leads to tons of success in the industry.

I already know what the Cole defenders say too “ooo hr comes from a less privileged upbringing and has to work for what he got unlike most of the cast” and yes and no. Show Criston doesn’t feel that great of a warrior, but he is. That takes talent… he also had like superhuman luck and the ability to be in the right places and the right time. Either way, he was Lord Commander and Hand at the same time. He could’ve set up a house and stepped away pretty much any time, lived as a well off lord. “But he’s just a poor victim of bigger forces like Alicent and Rhaenyra and blah” nope. He’s a grown man who made all his choices himself. Show robbed him earning “Kingmaker” quite a bit, but he actively contributed to treason and conspiracy to drown Aegon because he couldn’t move on from a hook up decades later in his late 40s. Wild. Calling Cole a victim as a defense is so weird too. So you’re defending him by… taking away any agency he has and chalking everything he does up to “uhh this person made me do it. I don’t do anything myself, I can’t make my own decisions”? Thinking he’s a victim and claiming that just makes him seem even more pathetic.

Hopefully that soooo on the nose death cleared up George’s feelings on this guy and his life, and where it led him, and if you should be admiring him OR seeing him and seeing everything you shouldn’t be.

If that went over your head, well, there’s a very good chance we’ll be seeing his head paraded around on a stick next episode to really drive it home. His body? Left behind in a random ditch with the other dead. No knight’s burial rights, definitely not respectful Kingsguard funeral, not even recognizable and just rotting away in some nameless place and his head? Just attached to a stick to throw in the Hightower’s faces and mock even in death. He got what he deserved. If you genuinely like this guy (as a person, not enjoy his character,) I highly doubt you have a healthy dating life and relationship towards women.

My SIL on Cole’s death “who are the woman haters gonna root for now?” (I know this topic could and would bring out the wild Criston Cole fanboys)