Why do I have to pay people to hang out with me?

The title says everything. I have to pay people, friends and family to hang out with me be because they won't otherwise. I'm so lonely. Same goes for dates, I have to pay for them to hang out. No one will naturally. Am I really that abhorrent that I need to pay for people to be around me? It makes me not want to exist. Look I know I'm autistic and weird but really? I have to pay for you to be in my presence