No diaper change

Guys, this is going to be long.

So my mom watches my 2.5 yr old child once a week and has since they were 9 weeks old. I also have a 9 mo old. They have not been there for the last 4 months because my parents moved and she said it was just too chaotic and she needed time to unpack. Totally get it, not everyone unpacks quickly and she doesn’t owe me child care. I’m a sahm so we do it just because she enjoys it and it gives me time to deep clean. Last month she invited my husband I and both babies over for dinner and there were still boxes everywhere. I was able to look past that and keep my children out of boxes. The disaster came with my nine month old baby, (8 mo at the time) pulled up on a floor length mirror that was leaning against the wall and pulled it on top of herself. I do not know why I assumed this mirror was anchored. It was an absolute lapse of judgment on my part. Either way, we rush her to the hospital to get x-rays done and she was fine thank God. But my mom never reached out to check on her until the next day. And when she did ask how she was, I mentioned that she was pretty bruised up, but seemed to be OK and instead of saying oh thank God, she coldly responded “send us the hospital bill when you get it”. This stopped my tracks because it was so out of character. I called her out and a massive fight ensued and eventually she appeased me by saying she was sorry and she should’ve checked on me and my child. Fast forward to present time. I asked her a month ago if she could watch the kids today. I had a doctors appointment and a dinner party scheduled for this weekend and needed to get some stuff done. She agreed. I dropped my child and his baby sister off at 10 AM and picked him up at 5 PM. My husband went to go change our son and yelled from the other room. “ hey, he still has the same diaper on from this morning”. I kind of rolled my eyes at the accusation and sure enough. He had a strip of hot pink duct tape over his diaper. We’ve been duct taping his diaper on because he’s become a little streaker. He will rip his diaper off and pee over the place. I text my stepdad about it because I was concerned and I didn’t want to bring it up to my mom just yet. I asked if he had noticed any sort change in her as far as memory goes and he became super defensive saying that the baby cried the whole morning so she probably didn’t have time because she was so busy with the baby and that he could understand being upset if they were a daycare, but they are not so I shouldn’t be so upset and that my son should be potty trained and this wouldn’t have happened. Y’all, I swear it was my mom texting from his phone. My step dad has never spoken to me that way. He is the voice of reason in every situation. He is the keeper of the peace. I feel like my mom is having memory issues and I don’t feel safe with my kids there anymore.