Genuine advice to accept that sex (especially oral) will never happen again for me? Unsure how to move forward.

I’m 30f. Sex has never been something anyone really wanted from me and now, after recent medical events, it’s become obvious sex will never happen again for me.

I’ve slept with 3 people my whole life. (1 one night stand, 1 two week hook up, and my current relationship of 7years. Had sex less than 35 times total between all 3.) It’s always been something I really wanted but it just didn’t happen for me, I’m just not someone people want to bang. And that’s okay! Not everything is about that, but as someone who always thought about sex and even idolized the idea of it, I feel like I’ve missed out a huge part of my life. I’ve never been given oral (despite being pretty obsessed with it), I’ve never came from penetration or fingers, and in the few dozen times I’ve slept with my partner it was very much a get it over with as soon as possible situation for them.

I realize this is an individual problem and I need advice on where to go from here. I’m willing to accept the fact I’m just not someone who is wanted that way, and now with a colostomy I’m trying to figure out how to handle these feelings and negate the want to be wanted as I’m now beyond unfuckable with this sort of disability. (It’s pretty gross so be warned if you look it up.)

I hope this doesn’t break sub rules as I need genuine individual advice for how to handle sex (or lack of it) going forward for the rest of my life. I don’t know where else to ask, if there are better suited communities for this, please share! Thank you so much.